Berta Mae is Back… and She’s Hungry!!!

May 19, 2010 — 7 Comments

Berta Mae, Research Cow Extraordinaire, is HUNGRY!

Okay, so you guys surprised me! I knew I had smart readers, but I was shocked at how many of you responded to my first set of questions regarding friendship, with such thoughtful insight.

Thank you!

Now here’s another question for you…

In order to be a true friend, we have to tell the truth even when it hurts, because lying to her (includes keeping quiet)  will hurt even more, right?

Now I know my opinion on this, but I’m prepared to be fascinated by yours.

Research Question:  In your opinion, is it okay to be brutally honest, in the context of close friendships? Another way of asking this is ~ do you value friends who are brutally honest with you? Or are you offended by their honesty? Please explain.

Keep those answers coming! Remember Berta Mae is hungry!!!! 🙂

In case you missed the first questions…

SOS! Research Help Needed!

Shine on Sisters!


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...daughter of the King, wife and mother ~ danielle believes all christians are missionaries; we're called to love Jesus and share that love through active compassion that brings tangible & eternal change in the lives of those we touch. no one should live more proactive, more giving, more sacrificial lives than those that claim to know Christ. time to remove the blinders & excuses and let the love of Christ flow through us.

7 responses to Berta Mae is Back… and She’s Hungry!!!

  1. I want my friends to be honest with me, especially if I am doing something to hurt them or irritate them. Also, if they think I am going down the wrong path, that would be helpful to know.

    I don’t really think women are that honest, though. Women listen, but usually don’t give advice, or the advice seems sugar coated. I wonder how much I’m irritating my friends with all my advice giving!

    • It’s been my experience that women are full of advice, but only up to a certain point. Most of us stop short of full disclosure if we feel our opinion may not be received. Maybe that’s when the sugar-coating begins… speaking as a friend, Shannon, you do not irritate me, but if you ever do, I hope I’d be honest with you so our friendship could remain. I value your perspective & view of life, and I’m glad you’re not afraid to share it!

  2. just a thought I think friends should be real with each other but not feel like they are always right about everything. So much of want we do is based on personal preference. People should be free to express themselves in their own style. We are all unique and different. Friends should enjoy the differences and learn from one another. Not try to imitate or change each other.

    • If there’s one thing I’ve learned from you it’s to not take offense just b/c someone gives an opinion different from yours. You exemplify this daily and it allows me & those around you to feel a great amount of trust in the relationship. Thank you for being a great example of what friendship & family should be. (for those that don’t know, Deb is my MIL – mother-in-love!) I am blessed!

  3. I absolutely think that you need to be honest with your friends. As the old saying goes, “The truth hurts”, but ultimately it is neccessary for friends to be able to trust each other. From personal experience I found out that a friend was bothered by some of my actions and instead of confronting me and being honest with me about her feelings she chose to walk away from our friendship. This hurt me deeply and caused a lot of stress between our group of friends that all could have been avoided had she just had the courage to tell me the truth.

    • Erin, I really appreciate that you shared a personal story of hurt. I think this happens more than we realize, but it hurts nonetheless. You make a good point – telling the truth takes COURAGE!!! Thanks for sharing and welcome to Moms4Change!

  4. I’m for honesty as well, but only if it is constructive… will make a positive impact on the person with whom you’re sharing.

    For instance, if a friend looks especially tired or crappy, I’m not going to point that out–she either knows because it’s a reflection of how she’s feeling, or she doesn’t know and telling her is gonna make her feel that way.

    But if a friend’s got a little whatchamacallit hanging out of her nose, I’m sure gonna take her aside and let her know. (I once had an insect stuck in my lip gloss and no one told me!).

    On more serious issues, I’m a big fan of honesty, but with a delicate, caring, compassionate touch. I also hope that I show my friends every day how much I love them, and so, when I am honest about something that may initially cause them a bit of unhappiness, there’s a reservoir of good feelings to buffer the pain.

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